Hooray! It’s almost time for the 4th of July, that special day when we wave flags, sing patriotic songs, set off fireworks, barbecue, and celebrate with friends and family. It’s one of our favorite holidays — except for one problem: it’s just not all that ergonomic. That’s right, we think about ergonomics even on Independence Day. Why? Because we think your body should be entirely independent of pain. As such, we’ve spent the afternoon brainstorming dream products to design for your most ergonomic 4th of July ever. Here are a few of our favorites.
1. Height Adjustable BBQ
Mmm, we can just smell those burgers, hot dogs, and chicken patties sizzling away on the grill. As diners, there’s nothing more rewarding than loading up on condiments and sides and sinking our teeth into this grilled goodness. But the master griller of the day may have a musculoskeletal problem or two on their hands once the heavy labor is over and the coals are cooling: grills aren’t exactly the right height for many people. This means that our intrepid chef likely spent the day hunched over the grill flipping, seasoning, and scraping, which is bound to lead to both neck and back pain.
Never fear: all of these problems will be a thing of the past when we design a height adjustable bbq! That’s right, just like a height adjustable desk, your master griller will be able to lower or raise the grill until it’s at the perfect height — no bending or hunching required. How much better will the meat be when the griller isn’t in pain? Only our taste buds can tell!
2. Robot Burger Flipper
Still, even with a grill of a proper height, the grill isn’t done wreaking havoc on the chef’s body. All of that burger flipping can strain the wrist, especially when done with enough pressure exerted to turn the burger fully over. To remedy this, we propose the invention of a new robot burger flipper. That’s right, your burger flipping-induced wrist pain will be a thing of the past when you employ the skills of Burger Bot 2016. Just power on your robot bestie, bring him to the grill site, program in flipping times and stand back in awe as he flips those burgers with a mastery unknown to the human musculoskeletal system. It’s burgers without the pain!
3. Wrist Brace Sparkler and Flag Waver
The wrist is also at risk when it comes to sparkler and flag waving, two of the most popular 4th of July activities. Again, if you’re doing either of these activities well, your wrist will take the greatest hit, flipping and snapping enthusiastically beneath the fireworks or to the tune of a marching band. Far be it from us to suggest curtailing such patriotism and fun. Instead, we suggest donning a sparkler and flag waving wrist brace, designed specifically for this purpose. With the sparkler and flag waving wrist brace, your wrist will have all of the support and stabilization to do its job right without causing injury or strain. After one sparkler or flag waving session with it on, you’re sure to inquire, “Where have you been all of my life, sparkler and flag waving brace?”
4. Supportive Sneakers for Parade Marching
Are you going to be the star of your local 4th of July parade? Then supportive shoes are a must. After all, you’re going to get at least a mile or two of marching in, and if you’re doing it enthusiastically (it’s hard not to with the crowd cheering you on), you’ll be stamping and stomping those feet. This will put pressure on the arches of your feet, the tendons in your ankles and lower legs, and even on your knees. That’s why we suggest supportive shoes with great arch inserts to ensure you’ve given every part of your foot and everything that connects to it the support it needs. The added benefit to this one: unlike the other products we’ve mentioned so far, supportive shoes actually exist.
5. Electric Wine and Champagne Opener
Popping a cool celebratory drink is a must on Independence Day, but like so many other activities listed here, doing so with manual openers can strain your wrists — especially when it comes to wine and champagne. But not to worry: just get yourself an electric opener. Then stand back and watch the magic happen on its own. You’ll have your beverage in no time and your wrists will remain pain-free. Another plus for this one actually existing!
You’ve still got time to prepare for your ergonomic 4th of July — quick, start inventing these dream products! Or, if that’s out of the question, please do brag about your holiday plans in the comments. We’d love to hear all about them. Happy almost-Ergo 4th of July!
To shop awesome ergonomic equipment, click here to visit our Goldtouch store.